Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Blood test results
It was Tuesday and the last two Tuesdays we had found out about the cleft lip and then about the possibility of trisomy 18. I was home that day doing laundry and playing with my kids. We weren't expecting any results yet because they said it would take 7-10 business days and it had only been 5. I was talking to my husband on the phone about our upcoming trip we were deciding if we should book when I got a call from an unknown number, now normally I don't answer unknown numbers because I figure if it is someone who wants to talk to me they can leave a message and I can screen them, but since we knew that at some point we were going to receive the call about the results that I had started to answer unknown numbers. So I told my husband to hold on. I flipped over and the genetist asked if it was a good time to talk because they had received my test results back. I said yes (is it ever a good time to get results back that could be hard to hear). She proceeded to say that the test results did come back with abnormal results and that our daughter most likely had trisomy 18. She proceeded to say that we could do an amnio that was 100% sure but that the blood results were 98% accurate. She asked if we had questions and let us know we could contact them at anytime with any concerns or questions. She continued to talk to me and apologize for the results and say how sorry she was to inform me. I asked a few questions but once again my mind was blank, but as soon as she told me it was almost a peace that immediately came with knowing instead of the unknown. I think the past week we had been prepared to hear the results without wanting to accept that was what they were. I still cried but I kept most of it in because I needed to for myself and for my kids who were down the hall and had no idea what was happening to their little sister. To them they were still completely excited. I then called my husband to let him know what the results were. I felt awful because he was at work and I was at home at least. We discussed who we were going to tell and when. I asked once again if he wanted to come home and he asked if I needed him to. We decided that he could remain at work but we could hold each other later that night. The next couple hours I tried to just ignore the phone call because I wasn't ready to tell me and since no one was expecting the results I could, plus most my family was at work and I didn't want to ruin their day but it was going to be inevitable of ruining their day. I finely called my mom and told her who in turn told my dad. I remarkably held it together talking to both of them. I think at this point my tears were dry I had nothing left to pour out.