Friday, July 12, 2013
Lately I have been having some "poor me" days. I am nearing the end and like most pregnant women I am uncomfortable. Elizabeth has been sitting funny that is causing some major discomfort and pain on my right side mostly the ribs and back. I can't find a comfortable position that makes it hurt less. I have tried baths and a heating pad. I even went and got a pregnancy massage. Although the massage was nice it did not relieve the pain at all. So when I have these feelings of being so done I start feeling guilty because I know that being done means a different kind of pain. It has been an emotional couple of weeks dealing with this guilt and just knowing that the pregnancy is going to come to end soon and it is scary. Although we know the stats and Elizabeth's diagnosis it just is now making itself even more real as we near closer. I have been reading some wonderful, inspiring articles and trying to find inspiration in music also. When we first found out about everything I listened to song by Mercy River called Blessings. This song made me feel peace and I haven't listened to it recently but today I needed it. As I listened to the music it just made be feel at peace. It helps because I know that Elizabeth is a blessing and this trial was meant for me and I have my Heavenly Father guiding me through, along with a wonderful support system here on earth. Here is a link to the song. Blessings! An article that hit home was A Time for Faith not Fear. As I read this article I realized we have been living more in fear of what tomorrow might bring and when is the shoe going to drop but I realized we needed to have more faith that Heavenly Father knows what is going on and I need to trust him and try to live less in fear and more in faith that it will all work out the way it is supposed to maybe not the way I want right now.