As we continue to prepare it has been difficult because it isn't the same preparation we have done in the past for our other children. It kind of hit me the other day that we have no diapers, no formula, no nursery prepared, and no clothes that I have washed and prepared. We instead have prepared emotionally by reading uplifting talks, listening to music, funeral planning, creating special items that we want to make sure she has. It was hard to think of this because although everything about Trisomy 18 says that Elizabeth's survival rate is very rare, It made me feel that I haven't even let myself hope for more. I think this is because when I think of everything she would need to overcome I cry for her and the difficult trials she would need to face. As her mother I don't want her to suffer and so with that we have felt that preparing all these other items would be more for us and we don't want to make her suffer just so we can hold her longer. As I write that sentence it tears at my heart because I do want to hold her, I want to change her diapers, I want to feed her, and stay up all night with her but not at her expense. I love Elizabeth with all my heart already and so does her whole family. We want whatever Heavenly Father has planned for her and all else we know with our faith it will fall into place.
Pictures at 37 weeks above and 36 below